Yay! My first trilogy is nearing completion. I really wanted to finish the OMG, They stole my iPod… trilogy, but it relies too much on chance, whereas this is… well, stupidity is usually constant.
In Stupidity I we covered the neonazis.
In Stupidity II we covered the Venezuela-Iran love affair.
In stupidity III, we’ll discuss DICK Cheney.
While I won’t defend or malign Obama for publishing the CIA torture files (I wonder if they also contained the sinful playlists), I will state that Cheney’s reaction implies Incredible Stupidity in the Head. Cheney thinks that the dubious methods by CIA were effective in TWAT (The War Against Terrorism). I can imagine Cheney renting an auditorium in some prestigious hotel (Watergate?), where he explains to the liberal media (who are not all that happy, because they were hoping NOT to listen to Dick anymore) all about the effectiveness and efficiency of the interrogation methods. I imagine his speech something like this:
Dick : “Dear liberal media. Our *communist* cough* president Barack HUSSEIN Obama has released the content of CIA files that describe various tried and tested interrogation methods that helped to keep enemies of (God bless) America at bay and which were essential in fighting TWAT. You have all read these papers, so I won’t repeat their contents and I will not deny my connection to them.”
“We believe that the act of making these documents public will make the enemies of our great country more better prepared and more determined because they want to avoid these practices. So instead of publishing their plots in the newspapers, they will try to work in utmost secrecy because they will not want to be interrogated”
A few journalist exchange startled looks, obviously not getting the logic of this argument. Dick continues.
“They will also want to get even with us, which is why these papers should not have been published in the fist place. But this is not why I called you here, media. I want to share some statistics with you.”
“Did you know that our interrogation methods confirm that nearly all the suspects were terrorist. Nearly all of the interrogated persons confirmed they were related to Osama bin Laden. They also all attended Al-Quaeida training camps in the mountains of (fill-in-something)-stan. Surprisingly, many confessed they were planning to blow up various business institutions, skyscrapers and government buildings. They also confirmed that Iraq did have weapons of mass destruction, but these were stolen by Iran when our troops were not looking”
“Yes, 99% of our suspects turned out to be real terrorists. The 1% is currently burning in hell”
Journalists look at each other in disbelief and one of them raises a hand and asks: “Mr Cheney, do you believe that these answers, especially concerning the interrogation methods, were reliable ?”
“Yes, in fact, the suspects gave us names of various other persons, who, when brought to questioning under the same conditions, confirmed everything. If this is not proof, that you really can’t trust anyone”
“But Mr Cheney, how can you assure Americans that they were not just saying it because that’s what the interrogators wanted to hear?”
“Nonsense. We know of a historical precedent where another nation was rid of great evil and a real threat, using these methods, which were approved by the highest state authorities as well as the highest authority ever at the time”
The last journalist raises a hand and ask in a rather disturbed, shaky voice: “Are you referring to the Spanish Inquisition?”
“Yes, of course. And even now, more than 200 years afterwards there are no witches in Spain. They did an excellent job. I know you might think that we’ve done the wrong thing, but history will judge us, like it did the Spanish Inquisition. A great success”
That is what Dick might think and I think it’s incredibly stupid.
Peter S.
April 22, 2009 at 16:19 |
He doesn’t even have the sense to politely keep his mouth shut — even Bush knows better than that